


Would You Be So Kind

by Avery_Kedavra



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Camp AU, Crying, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Human AU, Insecure Morality | Patton Sanders, Kissing, Kissing in the Rain, Logic | Logan Sanders Angst, M/M, Morality | Patton Sanders Angst, Morality | Patton Sanders Needs a Hug, Morality | Patton Sanders is a Sweetheart, Morality | Patton Sanders-centric, Pining Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Rejection, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Doubt, because i'm soft, lots of pining, so much pining, you wouldnt believe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:53:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24239848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avery_Kedavra/pseuds/Avery_Kedavra
Summary: After years of pining, Patton finally asks out his crush. It...does not go as planned.
Relationships: Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 15
Kudos: 222





	Would You Be So Kind

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for a prompt on Tumblr! You can find me there at @averykedavra.
> 
> (Title is from Would You Be So Kind by dodie.)

By the end of the summer, Patton Hart was going to ask out Logan Crofters.

He made that promise at the beginning of the first session, staring at the counselor schedule that announced, once again, that he’d be spending his summer side-by-side with Logan. They’d been co-counselors for three years in a row, three years that Patton had spent sneaking glances and stammering whenever Logan talked to him.

Why he kept getting paired with Logan, Patton didn’t know. Thomas said they “worked well together.“ Whether that was true or not, Patton did always have a lot more fun when Logan was around. (He also dropped a lot more things and tripped way more often, but that was okay.)

The facts were: he was going to be spending three sessions/nine weeks/fifty-six days with a very smart, very nice, very pretty man. And this year, instead of pining hopelessly, Patton was actually going to tell Logan how he felt. He was. No excuses. The time was right.

There was the itsy-bitsy fact that Patton had said that for two summers already. But this summer would be the summer! Patton knew it. Maybe he’d even ask Logan out during the first session, and they could spend the whole summer together. Thomas was okay with counselors dating each other as long as they kept things professional. They could hold hands on the hikes and sing campfire songs together and Patton could finally give him the More-Than-Friendship bracelet he’d made in Year Two of Being in Love with Logan Crofters.

(Patton was pretty sure he was in love. If he wasn’t, he wouldn’t spend all school year waiting for his chance to come back to Camp Chickadee and hear Logan’s soft laugh as Patton tried to balance a spoon on the end of his nose.)

He loved Logan, and he was going to tell him. Half the camp knew about Patton’s crush, for Pete’s sake! It was only a matter of time until some well-meaning kiddo told Logan for him. Camp Chickadee might be surrounded by pine trees, but that was no excuse for Patton to keep _pining._

The first session passed. Patton did not ask out Logan. He negotiated a prank war between Roman and Remus, learned a new chord on the ukelele, carved a dog, and taught Virgil how to bake blackberry pie. He signed up to lead as many activities as possible that involved Logan. Together, they led a bunch of hikes, lifeguarded together, went biking, made a catapult, and, on one memorable afternoon, crowned Turtle the dog (not to be confused with Dog the turtle, the other camp pet) Supreme Leader of All Rocks, Stones, and Boulders. Logan never objected to Patton’s company. He never asked for it either, but it was a start!

On the last day of the session, the whole camp had an hours-long mud fight, built a campfire, and sang songs together. Patton watched Logan across the fire, his eyes gleaming in the light, singing along to Yellow Submarine even though he always insisted he didn’t like to sing.

Next session, Patton told himself.

They went rafting together. They made bread together. They mastered the rope course backwards and frontwards. They wrote a story about Turtle the dog and her conquering of Asia. One camper asked if Logan and Patton were dating. Patton tried not to blush. Logan didn’t seem fazed by the question. Good sign? Bad sign? Patton didn’t know.

Before he knew it, it was the last week of session two. Patton was playing Texas hold’em with Logan, Virgil, Roman, and Remus. Janus and Thomas were leading the whole camp in a singalong by Giant’s Ridge. Patton and the other counselors were supposed to be brainstorming activities for session three, but Remus had dared Roman to beat him at cards and now here they were.

Patton frowned as he lost for the fourth time in a row. Virgil, Roman, and Logan gave him sympathetic looks. Remus cackled with delight and very little sympathy.

“Wanna play again?” Virgil asked after Remus had, once again, won the game.

“I’ll pass,” Patton said with a smile. “I’m not very good at it.”

“Practice makes progress,” Roman pointed out.

“I think I’m with Patton,” Logan agreed, placing his cards down and standing up. “We can think up some activity ideas while you play a few more rounds. You know, the thing we’re actually supposed to be doing.”

Remus rolled his eyes. “I’m just gonna lead another search for the FBI base in the woods, Virgil will hunt for Mothman again, and you’ll do something boring like knitting. You’re all really predictable.”

Roman chuckled. “And what about me?”

“Talent show.”

“I hate that you’re right.”

“Still,” Patton said, “we should try to prepare stuff! Logan’s right, at least some of us should be brainstorming.”

Remus chuckled. “Of course you take his side.”

Patton tried very hard not to blush and didn’t really succeed. Fortunately, Logan didn’t seem to notice Remus’ comment. “We’ll be at the swing if you need us,” he said, giving them a nod. “Good luck, Remus.”

Amidst Roman’s offending spluttering and calls of “I thought you were on my side! Betrayal, heresy, et tu Brute” Logan and Patton walked to the swing. Patton usually lay sideways on the swinging bench, taking up more than half of it, but Logan was sitting on the other side with his hands over the side. Patton perched on the very edge of the swing and tried to put as much space between them as possible.

Then they brainstormed. Or, really, Logan brainstormed while Patton nodded along. He tried to think about activities, he really did, but Logan was right there and he moved his hands when he talked and his eyes sparkled when he thought of an idea he really liked and goodness, Patton was falling hard, wasn’t he?

“Patton!” Logan said, and Patton realized he’d been calling his name.

“Yeah?”

“You’ve hardly been paying attention.” Logan’s eyebrows drew together. “Is everything alright?”

“I...” Patton smiled. “Yeah! Of course! I’m just being spacey, is all. You know me--scatterbrained. Would forget my own head if it wasn’t on my feet!”

Logan frowned. “Your head is on your shoulders.”

“Oh, darn it! I knew I messed up _something_ when I got dressed today!”

Logan chuckled, holding up his hand to cover the sound. Patton wished he wouldn’t. He loved that laugh, light and airy and so different than the serious image Logan always tried to show.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Logan asked again after his laughter died, and his voice was so _concerned._ Patton couldn’t handle this. He couldn’t! “If there’s...if you need to talk about anything with me, know that I am here to listen.”

Patton couldn’t stop his mouth from dropping open slightly. He probably looked flabbergasted, gobsmacked, and all sorts of interesting words. But he couldn’t help it! Logan was so nice! And they were making eye contact and Logan’s eyes were such a nice shade of brown...

“Patton?” Logan said again.

Oh no. He really needed to stop that.

The only way to stop it, said the voice in the back of his head that sounded kind of like Virgil, was to confess.

Patton reached into his pocket and his hands grasped the bracelet he’d made Logan last year. Blue and navy threads in the most complicated knot Patton knew, looped around a few red beads. A More-than-Friendship bracelet. A gift.

“I...” Patton swallowed. “Logan?”

“Yes?”

“I have something for you?”

He didn’t mean for it to be a question, but his voice squeaked at the end. Well. Good enough.

Logan looked confused, probably because they’d gone from a heartfelt conversation to...this. “What is it?” he finally asked.

Patton steeled his nerves and held out the bracelet.

“Another friendship bracelet?” Logan laughed a little, and Patton knew he was projecting but it sounded like such a fond laugh. “Patton, I don’t think I have room left on my arms.”

“It’s...not exactly. A friendship bracelet.” Patton shifted. His hands were all sweaty and he just wanted to bury himself in the dirt. Why did he think this was a good idea?

“Then what is it?” Logan asked. Innocent. Completely unaware of the anguish Patton was experiencing.

It wasn’t too late. He could call it a co-counselor bracelet or a best-friends bracelet or a bracelet to ward off evil spirits. He could call it anything! He could still get out of this!

But some brave, foolish part of Patton remembered that he only had a month until he wouldn’t see Logan for a whole school year. Only a month to do this. Only a month.

“It’s a...it’s an I-like-you bracelet?”

Logan blinked. “A what?”

“An I-like-you bracelet.” Patton tried to smile. “‘Cause I...I like you? Romantically? I like-like you? I have for a while now, I guess? I thought I’d...I dunno, let you know?”

His voice kept squeaking. Patton decided he’d dug his hole deep enough and shut his mouth.

“You like me,” Logan repeated, expression unreadable.

“Yes,” Patton said, bracing for an explosion. Preparing himself for Logan to yell at him, reject him, say he was creepy and he didn’t want to be friends anymore. Trying not to hope. Trying not to let himself hope. Why did he ever think Logan would like him back? Why was he that naive? Right now, sitting in the sun, his dreams of holding hands and singing songs together seemed childish, foolish, and unreachable.

“Thank you,” Logan said, “for telling me.”

Patton still couldn’t get a read on Logan. His voice was blank and his face was more so. Usually Patton could tell what Logan was feeling, even though he tried to hide it, but now? Patton was lost.

“You’re welcome?” Patton asked. Squeaking again. He was just a little mouse, wasn’t he?

Logan opened his mouth, closed it again, and slipped his hand around Patton’s. Carefully, he lowered Patton’s hand to the bench. They sat that way for a second, Logan’s hand covering Patton’s, Patton’s clenched around the bracelet.

And somewhere, beneath the panic and the doubt and the resignation, something settled. This felt right, so right, like he’d slotted together two puzzle pieces and realized what the picture was supposed to be. He was sure his hand was sweaty and gross and of course it was really awkward because Logan hadn’t actually _told_ Patton what he thought...but they were holding hands. Kinda sorta maybe holding hands.

Then Logan’s hand slipped off Patton’s and Logan was standing up, brushing off his shirt.

“I think,” he said slowly, “it’s best if we don’t talk for a while.”

Patton felt like he’d been punched in the stomach. “What?”

“I’m sorry. I just think...I think it would be easier on us.” Logan cast him a sympathetic look. “I do appreciate you, Patton, as a friend. I hope you realize that.”

Oh.

_Oh._

A lump was growing in Patton’s throat. No. He wouldn’t cry. Not here, not now, not ever.

“Okay,” he forced out, trying to smile.

Logan gave him a final nod and walked towards the picnic tables, where Roman and Remus and Virgil were still playing cards. Logan slipped onto the bench and they passed him some cards without hesitation. He didn’t look back at Patton. Not once.

Patton? He curled up on the bench, tucked his head between his knees, and tried his best not to cry.

But his best was never good enough.

So he ended up crying into his cargo shorts, alone on a swinging bench in the summer sun.

Third session came, and for the first time ever, Patton wished the summer was over.

He loved Camp Chickadee. He did! He loved the campers and his fellow counselors and Thomas and the beautiful woods around them. He loved choosing activities and making friends and exploring the trails around camp. He loved baking treats and counting stars and singing his favorite camp songs. He’d been going to Camp Chickadee since he was four or five. It was his favorite place in the whole wide world.

And third session wasn’t even that bad! He investigated some FBI activity in the woods with Remus and got to be a secret agent! He hunted down Mothman with Virgil and sang songs in the Talent Show with Roman and even managed to get through a carving session with Janus. Janus and him didn’t really get along, but anyone was better than Logan.

Logan, who’d barely looked at him all session.

They were still co-counselors, of course. They still managed their ragtag group of kiddos together. But they never spoke to each other unless it was professional, and whenever they could, Logan avoided Patton altogether.

Patton hated it.

Logan was his best friend. They knew each other’s middle names and favorite colors and least-favorite colors and secretest dreams. They texted occasionally throughout the school year, but somehow Patton never grew tired of Logan or found someone else in his college. Somehow he always came back to Camp Chickadee and Logan’s laugh and a place he really belonged.

And yes, Patton had a crush. And yes, Logan didn’t have to reciprocate it. Friendship wasn’t a consolation prize! He would have been disappointed if Logan didn’t like him back, but as long as they could stay friends, it would have been okay.

This, though...this was isolation from the person he cared most about. This was Logan shutting him out. This was going cold turkey on one of Patton’s most precious friendships.

Patton spent a lot of time in the camp bathroom, trying to cry as quietly as possible.

He was pathetic, really. Like a little kid back in elementary school. He still kept that bracelet in his pocket. Every day he woke up and stared at the cabin ceiling and hoped against hope that Logan would decide that they could be friends again. Every day he said hello to Logan, hoping Logan would say hello back, hoping he would smile.

Logan always just nodded and turned away, and the knife inside Patton’s heart twisted a little deeper.

The campers didn’t seem to notice the difference. Patton was still full of dad jokes and sunshine, putting up a perfectly crafted facade. Logan was still an expert on all flora and fauna, able to spot a bird from a mile away. Patton still sang every camp song he knew. Logan still recited the elements from memory. They were still the same.

Just...they couldn’t work off each other anymore. Patton couldn’t make Logan laugh with his puns, Logan couldn’t remind Patton of the lyrics he forgot, they couldn’t build off a story together or make up a game together or comfort a kiddo together. Logan was smart and logical and calm, Patton was energetic and sunny and creative. When they worked together, they could do anything. When they didn’t, they were just two different people with different ideas and different lives.

The campers didn’t notice the difference, but Patton did.

And the other counselors did.

“Are you...good?” Virgil asked when he saw Patton curled up under a tree, staring at his feet.

“Yeah, of course!”

“What’s up between you and Specs?” Roman asked after a very awkward singalong where Logan and Patton ended up sitting next to each other.

“Nothing!”

“Is everything alright with you?” Thomas asked during a camp meeting, after Patton chose to work with Janus instead of Logan. “Did something happen?”

“Of course not!” Patton smiled.

“Really? Because--”

“We’re fine, Thomas,” Logan interrupted, voice cold. “Let’s move on.”

They moved on, but Patton got many concerned glances throughout the meeting. He tried his best to field them with smiles. Nobody seemed very convinced.

“Are you mad at Logan?” asked Mia, a seven-year-old with a butterfly t-shirt and a gap between her front teeth.

“No!” Patton insisted.

And that was the truth. As much as Patton _wanted_ to be mad at Logan, as much as he wanted to be _furious,_ he just wasn’t. He couldn’t bring himself to even be annoyed with Logan Crofters. Maybe that made him weak. Pathetic. Soft. But that was the truth. Patton didn’t like hating anyone, and hating Logan was simply impossible.

He busied himself with tents and hikes and tried not to think about everything too hard.

And soon it was the last week of the session. And Patton was dealing with his usual _oh-no-the-summer-is-almost-over-I’ll-have-to-go-back-to-college-and-study-instead-of-picking-wildflowers-with-my-adorable-kiddos_ sadness, but he almost felt relief. He could go back to school now. He could hang out with his school friends and maybe get a new crush and not have to think about this anymore.

Still, he would miss Virgil and Remus and Roman and Thomas and maybe Janus. They started a group chat together, but it wasn’t the same. Roman had added Logan to the group chat. Logan had immediately left. He said he just didn’t like group chats, but Patton knew what it was really about.

The last day of Camp Chickadee, it rained. Poured, in fact. The kiddos dashed to their cars in yellow and red raincoats, giggling and shoving each other in the mud. The pine trees dipped, water sloughing off the branches and splashing on the paths. The drum-drum-drum on the lodge roof was interspersed with goodbyes and hugs and a few tears. Patton wished each of his kiddos the best of luck and tried not to cry too much.

Finally it was just the counselors, standing together in the chilly, damp Lodge, looking out at the rainy woods. The campfire was soaked, the swings dripping, the air fresh and tangy with the scent of rain.

“I should go,” Logan said, getting up from the chair in the corner.

“You sure?” Virgil looked disappointed. “Can’t you hang with us a little longer?”

“I have to pack for the move,” Logan said like that made sense. “Sorry.”

Roman frowned. “You’ll be back next year, right? I don’t care if you have to drive across the country, you’re coming back.”

Logan huffed and smiled. “I’ll see, Roman.”

“You’d better.” Roman paused and leaned forward, giving Logan a huge hug. “You’re the best, nerd.”

Logan patted Roman on the back. “I enjoy your company as well. Prep.”

“Hug time!” Remus leaped onto Logan’s back. Virgil crept around sideways and squeezed Logan’s waist, and even Janus gave Logan’s shoulder a squeeze. Thomas watched them with a smile. Patton watched them without a smile. What was happening?

Finally Logan extricated himself. Thomas reached out a hand and Logan shook it.

“We’ll miss you,” Thomas said. “You’ve been a great counselor.”

“Thanks,” Logan said, giving him a small smile. “I’ve loved it here.”

Thomas nodded. He looked like he was trying not to cry. Logan reached down and swung his backpack over his shoulders before walking out the door into the rain.

The other counselors watched him go.

“Um,” Patton whispered. “Guys?”

Virgil glanced over. “Yeah, Pat?”

“What was that?”

“What was what?” Virgil looked confused. “Hey, why didn’t you say goodbye to him? I know you guys are going through a rough spot, but I thought he’d want to see you before he left.”

“But we’ll see each other next summer,” Patton said. “Right?”

Virgil’s face fell. “You mean he didn’t tell you?”

All the counselors were looking at him with sympathy. Patton didn’t know what was happening. Was Logan leaving? Where was he going? Had Patton been so terrible that he drove off Logan for good?

“He’s moving away,” Roman said softly. “He finished college last semester and he’s moving to his new job.”

“What?” The room was spinning. “What--how long have you known?”

“He told us a couple weeks ago,” Thomas added, looking at Patton with concern. “I assumed you knew as well, you’ve always been so close--”

“I--” Patton shook his head, glancing at the open door. “I--I need to--”

“Pat?” Virgil asked.

Before he could stop himself, Patton bolted out the door and into the rain.

The water immediately drenched him. His curls stuck to his face, his clothes plastered to his skin, his glasses covered with droplets. Patton fumbled with them and stuck them in his pocket. The world was blurry now, but he could see the vague shape of the driveway. As he approached, it was clearer. Logan was tossing his backpack in the trunk of his car and slamming the door, walking around to the front.

“Logan!” Patton yelled, skidding over a patch of mud and coming to a stop.

Logan turned around. He was soaked as well, rain running down his cheeks. “Patton? What--”

“You’re leaving,” Patton said.

“Oh.” Logan nodded, looking sheepish. “Yes?”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Well...that is to say, I--” Logan ran his hands through his hair. “I didn’t want to make a huge fuss about it.”

“A _fuss?_ ” Patton repeated. “Lo, I’m never going to _see_ you again!”

“I’m only moving,” Logan protested, “and I might be able to come back next year anyway--”

“That doesn’t matter!” Patton’s eyes were burning, and not because of the rain. “Y-you’re my friend and you’re l-leaving and I get that I messed up and made things weird and you h-hate me, and that’s okay! That’s okay! I g-get it! But I-I’ve liked you for th-three years! You’re my b-best friend and I c-care about you even if you d-don’t c-care about m-me--”

He was crying now. Damn it! Patton swiped viciously at his cheeks. At least the rain hid his tears.

“So please,” Patton said, staring at Logan, “please just let me have this, okay? P-please let me say goodbye.”

Logan’s mouth was open. “Patton, I--”

“You don’t have to say anything.” Patton leaned forward and hugged Logan quickly around the shoulders. “I-I just wanted to do that. So...yeah. Um. Good luck.”

He pulled away and turned back toward the Lodge, giving Logan a final wave. Then a hand caught his own. Patton looked down to see Logan’s hand curled in his.

“What--” Patton looked back. Logan looked about to cry. “Lo?”

“Three years?” Logan repeated. “Patton, I thought it was just a crush, I--”

“You don’t need to...” Patton tried to tug his hand out of Logan’s grip. “It’s fine, really--”

“And I turned you down,” Logan said softly. “Patton, I--I didn’t realize how much you cared--”

“You don’t have to pity me,” Patton said miserably. “I get it. I-I made things weird. It’s fine. We-we don’t have to see each other ever again if you don’t want to--”

“Patton, can I kiss you?”

Patton’s train of thought stuttered to a halt. “What?”

“I--” Logan’s eyes were wide. “I like you, Patton! I like you a lot but I was going to move and I knew I’d just be leading you on and it would never work out long-term and I probably should have just told you that instead of isolating myself from you but I’ve never been able to handle these sorts of icky complicated emotions and Patton, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize how much it would affect you and--”

Patton swallowed. He wanted to pinch himself, see if he was dreaming, but the cold rain on his face told him otherwise.

Logan was rambling now, waving his hands, apologizing over and over and promising Patton that it was okay if Patton didn’t forgive him but he did really like him and Patton was funny and amazing and wonderful and deserved the world and Patton was just standing there, his hand still in Logan’s, heart filling up with joy.

And when Logan reached a pause, Patton stood up on his tippy-toes and kissed Logan.

Logan made a little squeak of surprise. But his hands wrapped around Patton’s waist and he kissed back. His wet hair dripped down Patton’s face and their mouths kept slipping out of each other’s and it was messy and cold and Patton was still crying a little bit but Logan was holding onto Patton and Patton had one hand on Logan’s cheek and another tangled in his hair and despite the cold and the rain and the circumstances Patton could just stand here forever and that would be perfectly, absolutely fine.

Finally Logan pulled away for breath, leaning his forehead on Patton’s. Patton giggled a little when he saw Logan, glasses fogged up, hair askew.

“This won’t be easy,” Logan muttered, searching Patton’s eyes. “Long-distance relationships are more complex and less likely to be successful--”

“Lo.” Patton pressed a quick kiss to Logan’s nose. “I’m willing to try if you are.”

Logan breathed and smiled wider than Patton had ever seen him. “I’d like that.”

“Good.” Patton reached into his pocket and pulled out that same blue-and-red bracelet. “Um...then, Logan Crofters, do you take me to be your lawfully wedded boyfriend?”

Logan laughed against Patton’s nose. “I do.”

Patton slipped the bracelet over Logan’s hand. “Oh no, it’s loose!”

“That’s okay.” Logan took Patton’s hand and slipped it into his so the bracelet surrounded both their wrists. “More room for us.”

Patton giggled. “Now we’re stuck together, Lo,”

Logan pressed a kiss to Patton’s hand. “Good.”

Patton giggled even more, resting his head on Logan’s shoulder. He was probably blushing furiously, but he found that he didn’t care. “You’re such a softie.”

“Don’t tell anyone.”

Patton smiled. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

And even though Logan had packing to do, they stood there for a long time, arms around each other, until the rain finally stopped and the sun peeked out from behind the clouds.

It was the end of the summer, but the beginning of something even more wonderful.


End file.
